Include Your Child Rather Than Distract Them

How much do you use distraction as a tool to make your child feel better? Or to hurry the process along? Or to ease your frustration?

Remember it’s not your job to make your child happy, it’s your job to help them learn to be comfortable with being uncomfortable.

For example when changing your child’s diaper, instead of waving a toy around to distract them from their frustration, INCLUDE THEM IN THE PROCESS. Allow them to close one side of the diaper while you do the other. Try saying “you may push the front of your pants down and I will help push down the pants from the back. Let’s work together.”

When your child is getting in the car seat and expressing frustration, instead of saying look at the birds flying in the sky while you buckle the strap, INCLUDE THEM IN THE PROCESS. Let them get in the car seat on their own. Let them buckle the chest clip, even if it takes longer. Give them time to get there.

I get a lot of questions about struggles to get in the bath. This is another example of the importance of including them in the process. Instead of “come look at all these bath toys” try “would you like to turn on the water” or “I wonder where your towel is? Hmm””