Why We Wait to Introduce Makeup to Our Children
Why We Wait to Introduce Makeup to Our Children
One of the questions I get asked most often is, “What makeup do you recommend for kids?” My answer usually surprises people because before we talk about what makeup to use, I think we need to ask whether children need it at all.
In our family, we aren’t anti-makeup. I’m simply pro-childhood.
Childhood is such a short season, and I want my children spending these years climbing trees, building forts, creating art, getting dirty, and discovering who they are and not wondering if they need to change how they look. I want them to learn that confidence comes from who they are, not what they put on their face. I also want them to know that healthy skin is something we care for, not something we cover up.
As a public health expert, I also think about ingredient exposure. Children’s skin is thinner and more delicate than adults’, and many conventional makeup products contain ingredients I’d rather my children have less exposure to. Even “clean” makeup isn’t perfect. That’s why we wait. And when we do introduce makeup, we choose products with safer ingredients and talk about makeup as something fun and creative and not something they need to feel beautiful.
Ages 4-6
“I know makeup looks fun, and one day you’ll be old enough to wear it. Right now, though, your skin is healthy and beautiful exactly the way it is. These years are for playing, exploring, making art, climbing trees, and using your imagination- not worrying about how you look.”
“If you want to play dress-up at home, we can absolutely do that together because pretending is part of being a kid. But makeup isn’t something we wear out at this age because I want you to grow up knowing your face never needs to be changed to be beautiful.”
Ages 7-8
“I know some of your friends wear makeup, and it’s okay to be curious. Every family has different rules, and this is one of ours. In our family, we try to protect childhood for as long as we can because these years go by so quickly.”
“Another reason we wait is because your skin is still young and delicate. Wearing makeup regularly can sometimes clog pores, irritate your skin, or contribute to breakouts and pimples. I’d rather help you keep your skin healthy than have you feel like you need makeup to cover anything up.”
“Most importantly, I never want you to believe you need makeup to be pretty. Your freckles, your smile, your skin, and your face are already beautiful exactly as they are. One day, if you choose to wear makeup, I want it to be because it’s fun and not because you think you need it.”
“And because makeup goes directly on your skin which is your body’s largest organ. We’re also careful about what we put on it. Even when you’re older, we’ll choose products with safer ingredients because your health matters just as much as how something looks.”
Ages 9–10
“You’re getting older, and it’s completely normal to become interested in makeup. I love watching you grow up, and I also want to protect your confidence while it’s still developing.”
“Wearing makeup every day can sometimes clog pores and contribute to breakouts, especially as your hormones begin to change. I’d rather help you take care of your skin now than feel like you have to cover it up later. My goal is for you to love your skin, care for it, and know it never needs to be hidden.”
“That’s why, around age 10, I’m comfortable introducing a little makeup for special occasions like a wedding, a performance, a holiday, sleep away camp, or another special event, but not for everyday school or play. I want makeup to feel like something special, not something you depend on.”
“When we do use makeup, we’ll choose products with the safest ingredients we can find because what goes on our bodies matters. And I always want you to remember that makeup should be something you choose because it’s fun or artistic, not because you think you need it to be beautiful.”
If They Say, “But Everyone Else Gets To!”
“I know that can feel hard, and it’s okay to feel disappointed. Every family has different rules, and this is one of ours. My job isn’t to do what everyone else is doing. My job is to make the choices I believe are healthiest for you, even when they aren’t the most popular. One day you’ll get to make these decisions for yourself, but while you’re growing, it’s my job to protect both your health and your confidence.”
If They Ask, “Then Why Do You Wear Makeup?”
“That’s a great question. Adults get to make different choices than children, just like I can drive a car or drink coffee and you can’t yet.”
“Come look in the mirror with me. Do you notice how your lips are naturally such a beautiful bright pink? When I was little, my lips were brighter too. As we get older, sometimes our natural lip color isn’t quite as vibrant anymore, so sometimes I like to wear a little lipstick to add some color back. But you don’t need to because your lips already have that beautiful color naturally.”
“That’s the difference. I’m not wearing makeup because I think I need to change who I am. I’m simply adding a little color. Right now, you don’t need that because your skin and lips already have that beautiful, youthful glow all on their own.”
“My greatest hope is that you spend these years falling in love with your natural face. Then, if you choose to wear makeup one day when you’re older, you’ll know it’s something you enjoy, not something you need.”
Our Family’s Guiding Principle
I don’t want to raise children who think makeup is bad. I want to raise children who know they are beautiful without it.
If they someday choose to wear makeup, I want it to come from confidence, not insecurity; from creativity, not comparison; and from self-expression, not the belief that they ever needed to cover up who they already were.