Fighting over Toys

Toys and fights.

Can anybody relate?

With new and exciting items comes a bit of sibling rivalry. So how do you handle it?

1) Sharing. Imagine you are sitting at a doctors office reading a magazine & someone leans over & says I want to read it give it to me. If a child has a toy in their hand and your other child wants it you may say “your brother is playing with that right now, when he is done with it you may have a turn.” .

2) If you find your children are constantly fighting over toys, allow them to take a box & pick 3 items that are theirs exclusively.

3) If your kids are struggling, providing the narration for them is key in order for them to properly verbalize their needs. Realize you will not always be around & you can’t always rescue them, so teaching them to stick up for themselves is important. (Ie: My son took my daughter’s silk scarf out of her hand which resulted in her screaming & coming to me for help— I pointed to my ear & said “it’s hard for me or anyone else to hear you so we don’t know what you want. When you calm down then I can help you. Once she calmed down she said ‘he took my scarf.’ I told her ‘go tell your brother I’m playing with that scarf, when I’m done with it you may have a turn. There are other scarves over there’ Instead of jumping in & rescuing her I am teaching her how to handle the situation herself. Now what if your oldest doesn’t want to give up the toy? That’s when I jump in & say “hmmm seems like we have a problem here” and I will narrate what’s going on and pose the question to the older child “how can we make your little sister feel better.”